My Own Journey with Breathwork - part II

Just two weeks after my first experience with healing breathwork, Krista Reid hosted an online group breathwork session on Zoom. I read the description carefully, taking note that a replay would be provided in case you couldn’t make the “live” event. Knowing that I had a prior engagement that evening, I was glad to read this, so I went ahead and registered, knowing that I would be using the replay. 

The evening after the live event, I logged on and pressed play on the recording. 

I had set myself up in my office, lying on my yoga mat with a blanket and my trusty eye pillow. I had popped my earbuds in my ears for immersive sound and had the Zoom recording playing on my cell phone. 

I was surprised by how effective the practice was. I had prepared myself for disappointment, thinking that the online experience would be lesser and that missing the live event would add another lay of distance. 

While I didn’t feel the same collective energy necessarily because I hadn’t been in contact with the other participants in any way, I felt some added comfort in being in my own home, and having the music right in my ears was also kind of nice. 

I don’t remember a lot about this particular practice, but I do remember emerging from my office and my husband asking if I was high because I seemed really quiet and spacey. I replied with an “I don’t think so …?”

Just two weeks later I found myself back at the yoga studio for another in-person breathwork session. My SIL was there with me again and I was READY. I had much less stuff with me and I felt like an old pro. I joined the circle with confidence and couldn’t wait to lay down on my mat and get going. Once I did, I jumped right into the breath pattern, pushing the breath forcefully through my mouth, sprinting towards contorted hands and tight lips as those were my signs that I was doing it “right.” When Krista encouraged sounding, I could hear my SIL sobbing and someone else crying loudly. I plowed right on through, not needing to sound or cry. Just running, searching for vibrations and sensation. While I don’t remember much about this particular session and any visions or sensations, I do remember walking away from it knowing that more people needed access to this practice. 

I went for a long walk with SIL and then we went out for dinner. She had been experiencing a lot of emotional upheaval and confusion and so we talked and talked. I told her about my pull to learn more about the breathwork practice and to teach it. 

Within days, I had emailed Krista, insisting that she teach me. She told me who here teachers had been (David Elliott and Erin Telford) and explained that she had been thinking about starting a training program that fall. 

I dove deep into researching her teachers, marked dates for their trainings and listened to both of David’s audiobooks. I agonized over which trainings to attend or whether to wait for Krista. 

We ended up having a phone conversation and she suggested a package that she offered where you do four 1-on-1 sessions with her over a 4-week period. I agreed this was a good idea and so at the beginning of September, we began the mentorship container. 

The first session took place on September 5th and was just as powerful as the ones before it. As I breathed, I heard messages and I saw my deceased grandmothers and great grandmothers and friends as well as my living supporters, including a previous personal coach, my therapist, Krista, my dear friend, Kate and my mother. I was blown away by their support and their love. Again, it felt like the culmination of healing after decades of sadness and years of therapy. Krista pulled an oracle card for me and shared the image and the interpretation with me. After the session, I pulled out my art journal and set to work. 

The second session provided more messages and more visions, all of which I documented in my written journal and in my art journal. It was also during this session that Krista encouraged me to let the breath fall out of my mouth rather than forcing it out. I began to settle into the breath more and felt greater trust. 

As we met regularly, I began to notice my issues with trusting others with my stories and pain and my related patterns. I started to take risks with sharing my thoughts and feelings with my husband, my friends and with Krista. I no longer felt the need to see my therapist every two weeks and I began my own regular breathwork practice. My fears lessened and my trust in the universe grew. 

Around mid-September, Krista suggested I come to her fall equinox retreat and while I debated about spending the money, I ultimately decided to go. It felt like a risk, travelling hours away by car (I’ve had a lot of highway driving anxiety over the years) to spend time with strangers and being emotionally vulnerable, but it also felt like the next step. And so, I packed up my stuff and off I went to Wolfe Island for a weekend retreat with Krista and 10 or so other women. 

At the retreat we breathed, and ate, rested and did yoga. I met incredible women and felt more at peace than I ever have. I made sound during the breathwork practice for the first time, and as I heard others sob, it gave me permission to allow my stuck emotions to bubble up and over. I walked away from that experience, changed. While some of the euphoric ease slipped as I returned to reality, the messages I received during the breathwork an the peace that I uncovered while there remain with me. 

And less than two months later, I began my official training with Krista Reid to be a breathwork facilitator (though I fully believe that my training began the moment I agreed to go to that first group session in July with my dear sister-in-law).